Dawn's Digression.
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Distractions
I recently decided that things in my life are too complicated.
A friend sent me a quote I had heard before, but the timing was just right. I'm not going to catch it verbatim, but it was something like, "Courage is having the strength to say 'What I'm doing isn't working, so maybe I should try something else." It hit me just right. I printed it and put it on the refrigerator.
I started thinking about the things I can change. Started looking for a house, etc.
Friday night I went to a Halloween theme park. Some lady read my runes. Or whatever the correct term is for that. I have no idea. Anyway, she was good. She really was. She said I was allowing things that weren't important to me distract me. She also said, "Do not keep reminders of things you don't want to remember." Hmmm.
My point is that my life has become unmanageable. I'm sick of the drama. Of barely hangin' in there. I'm pumped up on all kinds of pills, and I'm still not 'whole'. It's just not natural. So, I'm humbling myself. I've spent the last two weekends with my folks, and hopefully I'm moving about 15 minutes from them. (Ya'll cross your fingers for the little house I really want.) It's time to start living a little differently. I'm not sure what all that means, so I'll have to feel it out as I go.
I feel pretty damn good about it.
A friend sent me a quote I had heard before, but the timing was just right. I'm not going to catch it verbatim, but it was something like, "Courage is having the strength to say 'What I'm doing isn't working, so maybe I should try something else." It hit me just right. I printed it and put it on the refrigerator.
I started thinking about the things I can change. Started looking for a house, etc.
Friday night I went to a Halloween theme park. Some lady read my runes. Or whatever the correct term is for that. I have no idea. Anyway, she was good. She really was. She said I was allowing things that weren't important to me distract me. She also said, "Do not keep reminders of things you don't want to remember." Hmmm.
My point is that my life has become unmanageable. I'm sick of the drama. Of barely hangin' in there. I'm pumped up on all kinds of pills, and I'm still not 'whole'. It's just not natural. So, I'm humbling myself. I've spent the last two weekends with my folks, and hopefully I'm moving about 15 minutes from them. (Ya'll cross your fingers for the little house I really want.) It's time to start living a little differently. I'm not sure what all that means, so I'll have to feel it out as I go.
I feel pretty damn good about it.
Dawn, 7:56 AM
