Dawn's Digression.
Tuesday, January 13, 2004
Girls!
I couldn't decide where to start with this post, so I started with the funnest. Girls! College has lots and lots of girls! Skinny girls, fat girls, old girls, young girls, girlie girls, granola girls... All kinds. And I think the cutest ones take Statistics for Psychology. Yay!
I left work early Monday to go to school. I needed to get my parking pass and ID. I did not want to be rushed. The parking pass cost less than I thought it would ($75 through August), and there are a TON of spaces in the snobby parking. And yes, I went for the snobby parking. I asked the cheapest person I know (Mich) and she said to go for it. You never know when work will keep you late. Anyway, the parking is great.
Then I went to get my 'Comet Card'. That took a whole 10 minutes. I guess I forgot that all the cool kids started school in August, so there were no lines. I hung out in the student union for awhile watching the kids playing pool and ping pong as I sat eating a box of nuggets from Chick-Fil-A. I checked out the health center, counseling center, student organization center, TV lounge, quiet lounge, and I walked past the pub. A pub? Doesn't a pub have alcohol? Doesn't it? (Not rhetorical) At any rate, I lost all sympathy for that little brother of mine living the life at A&M while mommy and daddy foot the bill. I'm not going to let him fool me. He's having the time of his life. I mean, really. The girls! The student union! The Chick-Fil-A!
Finally, I went to Stats. The teacher is an older lady, and she seems very nice. She was speaking to us very simply, which would often annoy me. But not in a math class. I was grateful. If I miss a class, it comes off my grade. This doesn't affect me much in this class, since I can't see myself missing unless there is an emergency. I'm sorry, but HOW much am I paying for this class? $24.86 per class, not including books. Hell yeah, I'm going! A~, I'm not terribly intimidated by this book, yet. Yet.
And how weird is it that I said I 'watched the kids playing pool and ping pong'? Exactly how old am I, anyway?
I quit drinking a week ago.
I suppose it isn't that I quit, but that I really slowed down. Sucks, hunh? You know how I love my ASC's(Alternate State of Consciousness). I might rip off one of my arms for a Zima right now. Nah. I guess I wouldn't. But I sure would like one. Or a glass of wine. Something like that. Someone made me take a look at myself, and I saw. Dammit.
I'd like to address "Rackin' Frackin'"
We were at Six Flags on the ride that used to be called "The Cave". You know, before Six Flags sold out to Warner Brothers. It used to be splunkers (Yes, I'm aware that is horrid spelling. Bite me.). Now it is Yosemite Sam stealing gold. WTF ever. Anyhoo, we're riding the little boat through 'the cave'. I see a wanted poster for Yosemite Sam that said something about 'rackin' frackin'' I was like, OMG, what a great way to say 'fuck' without saying 'fuck'! And with a cartoon reference! So there you rackin' frackin' have it.
The girl that sat in front of me in statistics played with her hair the whole time. She kept winding it around her finger. I was enthralled. Her hair is auburn. I have no idea what she looks like. But the cute girl sitting next to me was looking at me. She was probably looking for a 'note buddy', but I felt less hideous, anyway. Nobody sat next to me, though, or introduced themselves to me. While I was glad no one sat next to me, I also wondered if I looked yucky, mean, or stupid...Or all 3. They don't want to be my friend?
Tomorrow is my appt at the psychiatrist. I'm a gonna get me some good drugs, ya'll. I can't wait. I've been manic lately. Ugh. I couldn't be more happy. It's been a full week. Which is a GREAT thing! Not trying to make drama out of it. I'm just recognizing it for what it is. You should've seen me in therapy last night. I was figitting. (How do you spell that?) Sitting on the edge of the couch. Looking at my watch. Looking at the clock. Looking at the books. Blabbing 90 to nothing and having nothing to bitch about. Cool, eh? Right! Except -- I always have an equal and opposite reaction. *sigh* Christopher says he still has me diagnosed with depressive disorder, but he thinks I am bipolar, too. But just a tiny bit. Not like the movies you've seen with the crazy people. So, I'm going to get drugs to take away the happiness I've been feeling (sucks), but maybe it will take away some of that hopelessness, too (Thank God.)
Melody and I had coffee the other day. Alright. So it wasn't coffee. She had hot chocolate and I had some weird ass peppermint tea latte stuff. But it was good, and it was fun. I'm so glad she lives closer now. Yay! I'm playing with her again this weekend.
I also have to go get glasses/contacts this weekend. Ugh. I have serious eye issues. I can't touch them. I can't. When I see a giant finger coming towards my eye, I freak out. It's either contacts or wear glasses all the time, I think. I can't see shit. Well, that's not true. I bet I can see shit. I can't see text. How's that?
I have a dentist appointment Monday to finally get my teeth fixed. Once again, Thank God.
I sure am thanking God a lot, aren't I?
Which brings me to:
You ever feel like someone is pushing their religion on you?
I do. And it is making me crazy. I'm suddenly very defensive, which already tells me something is wrong. Reckon I'm not very secure. I'm okay with not being secure. I'm not okay with folks pushing their religion on me. It pisses me off. Listen, almost all religion is a good thing. A reason to be nice. Hope. All that. But why do I have to believe the same as you? That's BS. And that's all I'm saying about that because I have to go cook now.
I left work early Monday to go to school. I needed to get my parking pass and ID. I did not want to be rushed. The parking pass cost less than I thought it would ($75 through August), and there are a TON of spaces in the snobby parking. And yes, I went for the snobby parking. I asked the cheapest person I know (Mich) and she said to go for it. You never know when work will keep you late. Anyway, the parking is great.
Then I went to get my 'Comet Card'. That took a whole 10 minutes. I guess I forgot that all the cool kids started school in August, so there were no lines. I hung out in the student union for awhile watching the kids playing pool and ping pong as I sat eating a box of nuggets from Chick-Fil-A. I checked out the health center, counseling center, student organization center, TV lounge, quiet lounge, and I walked past the pub. A pub? Doesn't a pub have alcohol? Doesn't it? (Not rhetorical) At any rate, I lost all sympathy for that little brother of mine living the life at A&M while mommy and daddy foot the bill. I'm not going to let him fool me. He's having the time of his life. I mean, really. The girls! The student union! The Chick-Fil-A!
Finally, I went to Stats. The teacher is an older lady, and she seems very nice. She was speaking to us very simply, which would often annoy me. But not in a math class. I was grateful. If I miss a class, it comes off my grade. This doesn't affect me much in this class, since I can't see myself missing unless there is an emergency. I'm sorry, but HOW much am I paying for this class? $24.86 per class, not including books. Hell yeah, I'm going! A~, I'm not terribly intimidated by this book, yet. Yet.
And how weird is it that I said I 'watched the kids playing pool and ping pong'? Exactly how old am I, anyway?
I quit drinking a week ago.
I suppose it isn't that I quit, but that I really slowed down. Sucks, hunh? You know how I love my ASC's(Alternate State of Consciousness). I might rip off one of my arms for a Zima right now. Nah. I guess I wouldn't. But I sure would like one. Or a glass of wine. Something like that. Someone made me take a look at myself, and I saw. Dammit.
I'd like to address "Rackin' Frackin'"
We were at Six Flags on the ride that used to be called "The Cave". You know, before Six Flags sold out to Warner Brothers. It used to be splunkers (Yes, I'm aware that is horrid spelling. Bite me.). Now it is Yosemite Sam stealing gold. WTF ever. Anyhoo, we're riding the little boat through 'the cave'. I see a wanted poster for Yosemite Sam that said something about 'rackin' frackin'' I was like, OMG, what a great way to say 'fuck' without saying 'fuck'! And with a cartoon reference! So there you rackin' frackin' have it.
The girl that sat in front of me in statistics played with her hair the whole time. She kept winding it around her finger. I was enthralled. Her hair is auburn. I have no idea what she looks like. But the cute girl sitting next to me was looking at me. She was probably looking for a 'note buddy', but I felt less hideous, anyway. Nobody sat next to me, though, or introduced themselves to me. While I was glad no one sat next to me, I also wondered if I looked yucky, mean, or stupid...Or all 3. They don't want to be my friend?
Tomorrow is my appt at the psychiatrist. I'm a gonna get me some good drugs, ya'll. I can't wait. I've been manic lately. Ugh. I couldn't be more happy. It's been a full week. Which is a GREAT thing! Not trying to make drama out of it. I'm just recognizing it for what it is. You should've seen me in therapy last night. I was figitting. (How do you spell that?) Sitting on the edge of the couch. Looking at my watch. Looking at the clock. Looking at the books. Blabbing 90 to nothing and having nothing to bitch about. Cool, eh? Right! Except -- I always have an equal and opposite reaction. *sigh* Christopher says he still has me diagnosed with depressive disorder, but he thinks I am bipolar, too. But just a tiny bit. Not like the movies you've seen with the crazy people. So, I'm going to get drugs to take away the happiness I've been feeling (sucks), but maybe it will take away some of that hopelessness, too (Thank God.)
Melody and I had coffee the other day. Alright. So it wasn't coffee. She had hot chocolate and I had some weird ass peppermint tea latte stuff. But it was good, and it was fun. I'm so glad she lives closer now. Yay! I'm playing with her again this weekend.
I also have to go get glasses/contacts this weekend. Ugh. I have serious eye issues. I can't touch them. I can't. When I see a giant finger coming towards my eye, I freak out. It's either contacts or wear glasses all the time, I think. I can't see shit. Well, that's not true. I bet I can see shit. I can't see text. How's that?
I have a dentist appointment Monday to finally get my teeth fixed. Once again, Thank God.
I sure am thanking God a lot, aren't I?
Which brings me to:
You ever feel like someone is pushing their religion on you?
I do. And it is making me crazy. I'm suddenly very defensive, which already tells me something is wrong. Reckon I'm not very secure. I'm okay with not being secure. I'm not okay with folks pushing their religion on me. It pisses me off. Listen, almost all religion is a good thing. A reason to be nice. Hope. All that. But why do I have to believe the same as you? That's BS. And that's all I'm saying about that because I have to go cook now.
Dawn, 7:13 PM
