Dawn's Digression.
Tuesday, December 02, 2003
I've been on the verge of tears all day. I have no idea why this is. I don't feel sad about anything in particular. I'm just lethargic and tearful.
I'm picking Ruby up from the airport in a couple of hours. Her grandmother died over the weekend, and Ruby is coming home for her service. I'm just going to pick her up and then drop her off at her parents house, but we've made plans for both Thursday and Friday nights. She asked if I could take Friday off of work, and I would have, except that I have training on Friday that the company has already paid for. So that's a bummer.
Saturday night Michele and I have a Christmas party for one of her organizations. We went to this thing last year, too. I'm not real excited about going, but at least I know what to expect and I know I don't need to look all that cute. Thank goodness!
I've been having horrible self-esteem lately. I feel awful. I have gained at least 20 pounds this year, and I'm feeling it. I put on a sweater this morning that is fairly new, and I just can't stand the way it is fitting. Michele told me to do something about it, which I feel is the appropriate response, but I'm in that special place where I feel too unmotivated and beat down to do that for myself. Darn it. It is good just to know that this too shall pass.
I didn't work on the advent calendar at all over the holiday, and I'm sad about it. I mostly laid around and felt sorry for myself, which is always a worthwhile activity. The therapist wants to put me on new medication, but I'd really like to avoid it if at all possible. He says if I don't improve in a couple of weeks, he is going to make a recommendation. *sigh* I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.
Happy news: I think my parents might give us a week of timeshare for Christmas. That would make me beyond happy. It really would. The last timeshare I took was incredibly relaxing. The last few vacations have been more stress than rest, and a week of nothing would do me a world of good.
I'm picking Ruby up from the airport in a couple of hours. Her grandmother died over the weekend, and Ruby is coming home for her service. I'm just going to pick her up and then drop her off at her parents house, but we've made plans for both Thursday and Friday nights. She asked if I could take Friday off of work, and I would have, except that I have training on Friday that the company has already paid for. So that's a bummer.
Saturday night Michele and I have a Christmas party for one of her organizations. We went to this thing last year, too. I'm not real excited about going, but at least I know what to expect and I know I don't need to look all that cute. Thank goodness!
I've been having horrible self-esteem lately. I feel awful. I have gained at least 20 pounds this year, and I'm feeling it. I put on a sweater this morning that is fairly new, and I just can't stand the way it is fitting. Michele told me to do something about it, which I feel is the appropriate response, but I'm in that special place where I feel too unmotivated and beat down to do that for myself. Darn it. It is good just to know that this too shall pass.
I didn't work on the advent calendar at all over the holiday, and I'm sad about it. I mostly laid around and felt sorry for myself, which is always a worthwhile activity. The therapist wants to put me on new medication, but I'd really like to avoid it if at all possible. He says if I don't improve in a couple of weeks, he is going to make a recommendation. *sigh* I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.
Happy news: I think my parents might give us a week of timeshare for Christmas. That would make me beyond happy. It really would. The last timeshare I took was incredibly relaxing. The last few vacations have been more stress than rest, and a week of nothing would do me a world of good.
Dawn, 2:07 PM
