Dawn's Digression.
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Shut The Mind Up
Well, I do feel a bit better, thanks goodness, but it has been a very heavy day. I got an article from a friend that talked about marriage and how happiness is inside us and that changing who we're with won't change our happiness. Right for the jugular. I didn't get all upset, it's just been hanging out in the front of my mind all day.
The whole school/baby thing may have freaked me out a bit as well, but I sat down tonight during class and made myself a 'master plan' so to speak. Somehow I am pretty much still on target to start trying to conceive one year from NOW. Of course, the whole conception thing will be hit or miss and may take a year or more. I'm not quite cocky enough to think it will be easy. It will be a long, lonely road in my eyes....the whole conception thing. And it will be terrifying if/when I find out there has been a success. Me. Single Mom. Freaking scary. I know it can be done. And when it is time, it is time. It's time for me. I've done everything I really see me doing and it's time for me to move on to diapers, soccer practices, teacher conferences and nights of watching horrid Disney movies. I still have a year to kick it up, and you can bet your bippy I'll be living the next year.
Now that I have that part down, I get to figure out the money part. I have the friend I've known for 10 years that has offered his 'services', but I am a little uncomfortable because I want the sample to be as *clean* as possible. I think you know what I'm saying.
Gads.
But hey, I got something straightened out in my mind which is more I had then when I left for school. I can see I can begin trying this time next year.....This gives a few months of misses until the fall. I totally want an Autumn baby, but that may not be what nature intends. We'll see.
Stupid collage making me all focused and stuff. OY.
The whole school/baby thing may have freaked me out a bit as well, but I sat down tonight during class and made myself a 'master plan' so to speak. Somehow I am pretty much still on target to start trying to conceive one year from NOW. Of course, the whole conception thing will be hit or miss and may take a year or more. I'm not quite cocky enough to think it will be easy. It will be a long, lonely road in my eyes....the whole conception thing. And it will be terrifying if/when I find out there has been a success. Me. Single Mom. Freaking scary. I know it can be done. And when it is time, it is time. It's time for me. I've done everything I really see me doing and it's time for me to move on to diapers, soccer practices, teacher conferences and nights of watching horrid Disney movies. I still have a year to kick it up, and you can bet your bippy I'll be living the next year.
Now that I have that part down, I get to figure out the money part. I have the friend I've known for 10 years that has offered his 'services', but I am a little uncomfortable because I want the sample to be as *clean* as possible. I think you know what I'm saying.
Gads.
But hey, I got something straightened out in my mind which is more I had then when I left for school. I can see I can begin trying this time next year.....This gives a few months of misses until the fall. I totally want an Autumn baby, but that may not be what nature intends. We'll see.
Stupid collage making me all focused and stuff. OY.
Dawn, 11:10 PM
1 Comments:
Once you try for a couple of months, you really stop caring when it's born. At first we were all "hmm, not too sure about a Leo baby..." but let me tell you, at this point I would take ANY baby at ANY time if my eggs would just work.
Congrats on making the master plan! I'm glad you're feeling better.
Congrats on making the master plan! I'm glad you're feeling better.
