Dawn's Digression.
Thursday, January 02, 2003
No Really, Cool Christmas
Anyway, as I was saying...
Sometimes I get all sad and I feel alone and like no one cares. And just when I've decided "fuck them all", someone steps up. Remarkably, two of them stepped up for me this time.
My best friend in New Hampshire sent me a picture frame with a bunch of pictures of us at various times between 1989 and present and this cool little poem called "Special Friends". I would've cried if the muffin hadn't been there looking at me. I miss my Ruby lots. I really do. Sometimes I just want to hop a plane and go up there to spend a weekend with her. She is my voice of reason.
My other very special gift was from Rachel. She gave me some really cool kitty pajamas and a Little House on the Prairie DVD (the one where Laura refuses to pray for her little brother and he dies...so she goes up to the mountain to get closer to God....I LOVE that one) and the last gift was a picture frame with a think called "I'll Be There For You" in it. I love it. It's sitting right here in front of me right now. I thought about taking it to work, but I am the most desperate when I'm at home at night, so I left it here so I can look at it.
Now, anytime I get sad, all I need to do is look up from my monitor....right above my monitor is the poem Rachel gave me. If I look a little higher, there is a shelf with the ceramic kitty Ruby painted, my 16th birthday present, the Christmas present the she gave me the first year after we broke up, and a strip of pictures from a photo booth. Right above that shelf is the photo collage she gave me. My own little friend oasis.
Rachel has been calling on me every day. I had a few rough moments over the holidays, and she knows this, so she has been watching over me.
Ruby also gave me daily calendar....The quote for January 2nd is "Once in a blue moon there's someone who knows it all, someone who knows and accepts you unconditionally, someone who's there for life." ~ Jill McCorkle
How lucky am I to have two? I am a very lucky girl. Lucky, indeed. And it is no coincidence that I had 5 year relationships with both of them. They know me better than I know myself. Probably better than I ever will. They keep me in check. Anytime I get a hair-brained idea, one of them is certain to speak up. Rachel is funny. She will actually laugh at my ideas. Instead of making me angry, it actually makes me think. And Ruby. She's kinda quiet. She will let you talk through something, occasionally stopping you to ask a question.
Sometimes I get all sad and I feel alone and like no one cares. And just when I've decided "fuck them all", someone steps up. Remarkably, two of them stepped up for me this time.
My best friend in New Hampshire sent me a picture frame with a bunch of pictures of us at various times between 1989 and present and this cool little poem called "Special Friends". I would've cried if the muffin hadn't been there looking at me. I miss my Ruby lots. I really do. Sometimes I just want to hop a plane and go up there to spend a weekend with her. She is my voice of reason.
My other very special gift was from Rachel. She gave me some really cool kitty pajamas and a Little House on the Prairie DVD (the one where Laura refuses to pray for her little brother and he dies...so she goes up to the mountain to get closer to God....I LOVE that one) and the last gift was a picture frame with a think called "I'll Be There For You" in it. I love it. It's sitting right here in front of me right now. I thought about taking it to work, but I am the most desperate when I'm at home at night, so I left it here so I can look at it.
Now, anytime I get sad, all I need to do is look up from my monitor....right above my monitor is the poem Rachel gave me. If I look a little higher, there is a shelf with the ceramic kitty Ruby painted, my 16th birthday present, the Christmas present the she gave me the first year after we broke up, and a strip of pictures from a photo booth. Right above that shelf is the photo collage she gave me. My own little friend oasis.
Rachel has been calling on me every day. I had a few rough moments over the holidays, and she knows this, so she has been watching over me.
Ruby also gave me daily calendar....The quote for January 2nd is "Once in a blue moon there's someone who knows it all, someone who knows and accepts you unconditionally, someone who's there for life." ~ Jill McCorkle
How lucky am I to have two? I am a very lucky girl. Lucky, indeed. And it is no coincidence that I had 5 year relationships with both of them. They know me better than I know myself. Probably better than I ever will. They keep me in check. Anytime I get a hair-brained idea, one of them is certain to speak up. Rachel is funny. She will actually laugh at my ideas. Instead of making me angry, it actually makes me think. And Ruby. She's kinda quiet. She will let you talk through something, occasionally stopping you to ask a question.
Dawn, 9:41 PM
