Dawn's Digression.
Monday, February 21, 2005
Ugh
I always start a more thoughtful entry by saying I don't know what I want to say.
So there it is. I don't know what I have or want to say.
Years ago, I used to play in chat rooms. Then it seemed they were all about sex. Once again, I'm in chat rooms. And I love it! At last. People who get what the fuck I'm talking about. I am sick and tired of no one having a clue. They don't. I've given up on my friends. They don't understand. They're not going to, and you know what? That's okay. I can't expect them to. I'm learning to accept that. Sure, it's sad and melodramatic and all that. So what?
I've been diagnosed as bipolar twice in the last 2 months. It seems like a bunch of shit to me, but I have to question it because this isn't the first time. The fact is that I'm moody. I'm in a great mood for awhile, and then in a depressed mood. I would say it is more cyclothymic than bipolar, but no one seems to know what that is. It's bipolar or nothing.
I'm going this week to a local medical school to be screened to participate in their bipolar study. Really what I'm looking for is some psychological testing. I've been diagnosed as bipolar at least 3 times, but I've never taken the MMPI or anything else. It's like they're pulling a diagnosis out of a hat. It's wrong.
At any rate, tonight I feel like shit. Blink and that will change. Hence the diagnosis. Again, I find that to be too dramatic. Maybe you haven't noticed, but I've been doing my best to steer clear of the drama the last year. You might also notice I've been posting less. Possibly a correlation? ;) You bet!
Anyway. Ginny's birthday party was cute. I'll post pictures later this week. At least I mean to. Jennifer & Danny and Rachel & Suzy came. So cute. Lame, yet cute. There's something to be said for lame. Now that I think about it......what a lovely time. I couldn't have had a better group.
Explain to me why I'm watching 976-EVIL instead of studying for tomorrow's test.
I don't go to bed at a decent time anymore. I stay up until about 1am almost every night. I just don't know what the next day will be like. By that, I mean that I don't know how much "me" time I will have. I require a LOT of downtime.
Oh, and BTW, I've lost weight! I'm down at least 1 size, if not more. It is SO fun. FUN! When I lose my 50 pounds, I've decided I'll only answer to "Foxy".
So there it is. I don't know what I have or want to say.
Years ago, I used to play in chat rooms. Then it seemed they were all about sex. Once again, I'm in chat rooms. And I love it! At last. People who get what the fuck I'm talking about. I am sick and tired of no one having a clue. They don't. I've given up on my friends. They don't understand. They're not going to, and you know what? That's okay. I can't expect them to. I'm learning to accept that. Sure, it's sad and melodramatic and all that. So what?
I've been diagnosed as bipolar twice in the last 2 months. It seems like a bunch of shit to me, but I have to question it because this isn't the first time. The fact is that I'm moody. I'm in a great mood for awhile, and then in a depressed mood. I would say it is more cyclothymic than bipolar, but no one seems to know what that is. It's bipolar or nothing.
I'm going this week to a local medical school to be screened to participate in their bipolar study. Really what I'm looking for is some psychological testing. I've been diagnosed as bipolar at least 3 times, but I've never taken the MMPI or anything else. It's like they're pulling a diagnosis out of a hat. It's wrong.
At any rate, tonight I feel like shit. Blink and that will change. Hence the diagnosis. Again, I find that to be too dramatic. Maybe you haven't noticed, but I've been doing my best to steer clear of the drama the last year. You might also notice I've been posting less. Possibly a correlation? ;) You bet!
Anyway. Ginny's birthday party was cute. I'll post pictures later this week. At least I mean to. Jennifer & Danny and Rachel & Suzy came. So cute. Lame, yet cute. There's something to be said for lame. Now that I think about it......what a lovely time. I couldn't have had a better group.
Explain to me why I'm watching 976-EVIL instead of studying for tomorrow's test.
I don't go to bed at a decent time anymore. I stay up until about 1am almost every night. I just don't know what the next day will be like. By that, I mean that I don't know how much "me" time I will have. I require a LOT of downtime.
Oh, and BTW, I've lost weight! I'm down at least 1 size, if not more. It is SO fun. FUN! When I lose my 50 pounds, I've decided I'll only answer to "Foxy".
Dawn, 11:37 PM
